


Dirty (but not so) Little (and not so) Secret

by SpiritOwl



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: F/M, M/M, Modern AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-20
Updated: 2013-04-20
Packaged: 2017-12-09 00:21:32
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,160
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/767806
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SpiritOwl/pseuds/SpiritOwl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Written for the KMM#28 prompt:</p><p>Arthur/Gwaine </p><p>All their friends constantly argue over which is more likely to happen: Arthur/Gwen or Arthur/Merlin. None of them are aware of what's happening right under their noses.</p><p>http://kinkme-merlin.livejournal.com/30557.html?thread=30071645#t30071645</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dirty (but not so) Little (and not so) Secret

Here they all were. All of Gwaine’s best friends crowded around tables pushed together in a small pub to accommodate all twelve of the group, tipsy and just this side of drunk. They were laughing and celebrating Elyan and Freya’s engagement. Not as though they much needed a reason to celebrate. They were a lively crowd, his bunch. They knew how to have fun and Gwaine loved them.   
  
They were back to this same old argument though. He’s not sure how they got here again. Probably discussing some wedding details and ended up on everyone else’s love lives. Or, the most interesting (if non-existent) romantic drama they had currently going on. Would Arthur end up with Gwen or with Merlin? They even had bets going.   
It was slightly ridiculous to Gwaine how these supposed intelligent adults could not, with the combined force of their deductive reasoning, figure out that it would be neither. Not for the foreseeable future, or if Gwaine has anything to say about it, that is.   
  
And that was exactly it. Gwaine did have a say in it. His friends just couldn’t see it. Maybe they didn’t want to see it; maybe they were too blind; maybe they just enjoyed their little soap opera too much to want to see anything else.   
Gwaine looked across to where Arthur was sitting exactly opposite, in front of him. He could see the strained smile on his face, the forced amusement. He kicks Arthur’s foot under the table to get his attention. It does. Arthur looks at him and the smile becomes a little softer, a little more genuine and Gwaine is helpless but to smile back.   
  
He resents his friends a little in that moment, for making Arthur uncomfortable in the first place. For dragging out such an obviously sore topic; but then they’ve already established that his friends don’t always notice the obvious. It’s all said jokingly, they’re still all mostly laughing anyway, but there’s an underlying tension to it all. As if they really believe that Gwen and Merlin are in love with Arthur and Arthur loves them both, but can’t decide between the two. They’re all just trying to make light of what could be a really fucking awkward situation – were it true.

 

It’s not true, but it’s still incredibly awkward. They’re taking votes now – to decide once and for all, of course, how it’s going to go. As if a drunken account of their opinion would actually have any sway on Arthur’s feelings and his inability to make a choice.   
  
It’s evenly matched thus far. Elyan choosing Gwen because how could someone not choose his wonderful sister; Mithian chooses Gwen, reasons unstated, but Gwaine’s always thought that Mithian’s been a bit jealous of Gwen; Lance also (reluctantly) chooses Gwen, even though he doesn’t want to see her end up with Arthur he’s starry-eyed blinded in love and obviously if given any choice, anyone would choose Gwen. Morgana’s almost vehement in her choosing of Gwen. Gwen is her best friend and Arthur is her (half) brother and if she marries him then she’d get the sister she’s always wanted.  
Freya chooses Merlin, because Merlin is her best and oldest friend. Elena chooses Merlin because she just has a soft spot for him and he’s ‘a sweetie to boot so Arthur should count himself lucky that Merlin would want him anyways.’ Leon chooses Merlin because he can make a mean apple pie and why wouldn’t he choose him if he got that every day? Percival chooses Merlin, but he’s always been rather protective of him and wouldn’t do anything to hurt his feelings.  
  
It’s all a bit biased. No one seems to be taking into account anyone’s actual feelings. They’re talking about it like they aren’t even people. Like they aren’t sitting right there listening. Like Gwen isn’t holding Lance’s hand under the table, because they’re being noble and kind and don’t want to hurt Arthur’s feelings or disappoint anyone else. Like Merlin isn’t even gay, but obviously, he’d just give up his sexual orientation if Arthur asked. Because Arthur is his best friend and he wouldn’t let something like a cock get in the way of their true, true love. Like he isn’t harboring the biggest crush on his best friend’s sister. Like said sister doesn’t treat Merlin like crap because she feels the same way.

 

And none of them say anything. They won’t say anything either. They’re all too scared, too deluded into thinking that Arthur sees or has ever seen either of them as anything other than a friend. He’s surprised all of the ego can fit in one building.   
  
They won’t ask Arthur because obviously he can’t decide. They won’t ask Gwen or Merlin for their votes either because it’s also obvious that they are going to vote for themselves. So the tie breaking vote goes to Gwaine.   
He looks over to Arthur again and the little shit is now smirking unabashedly at him, eyes twinkling with humor. He clinks the ring of his finger against the mouth of his beer before taking a sip. He should say something now; correct all their little assumptions. But he finds that he doesn’t want to. He narrows his eyes at Arthur, studying his face and pretending to actually think about his answer.   
  
He kind of wants to punch Arthur in his stupid grinning face. Or maybe that’s why they can’t see it. Because Gwaine and Arthur only get along half the time they’re together. And it’s not that they dislike each other, but have some kind of overwhelming lust that keeps them from ever separating. It’s more that the overwhelming lust keeps them at each other’s throats. They both have large personalities. Cocksure, competitive and aggressive. Always pushing at each other, urging the other on in some imagined way to one up the next. Foreplay.

 

They’re not even actively hiding anything. It’s right out there for anyone who wants to rub two brain cells together to notice. So Gwaine doesn't feel the need to announce anything. He feels like they should just know. They’re his best friends.   
  
Leon more than anyone else should be able to figure it out. He was Arthur’s closest friend when Gwaine had started school with them. He and Gwaine had been instant friends, but he’d set his eye on Arthur that first day. They didn't hit it off quite as well as he and Leon had, but not a month into that first term and they were in bed together.  
  
He was sixteen and horny and Arthur was uptight and hot and all he’d wanted to do was debauch that pretty mouth of his. So they’d lost their virginity together.  
  
Those last two years of high school were some of his best memories. Spent in a daze of studying and parties and Arthur. Not that it was always easy back then, not with sneaking around Arthur’s father and school rules and hormones.   
  
Back then when Arthur still cared about Uther’s opinion; when Uther hadn't approved of anything Arthur did. He’d often belittled Arthur’s grades, his sports, his sexuality, his choice in friends, or namely, Gwaine and his single mother, and his careless attitude, his bad boy image and his motorcycle.

 

He still remembers the first time he took Arthur out on his bike. Remembers the way Arthur felt behind him, body pressed up against him, arms locked around his waist, thighs pressing up along the outside of his and the sound his laughter ringing in Gwaine’s ears. Beautiful. They’d ridden round for hours before pulling up in front of Pendragon Estate.   
  
When Arthur had decided that he’d wanted Gwaine, the disappointment in Uther’s eyes had been clear as day; but then it always had been and it was the first time that Arthur had decided that he didn't care about fulfilling any of his father’s expectations of him. Baby steps, though. Arthur still craved his father’s approval and acceptance but he was willing to compromise with the man for now.   
  
Uther hadn't wanted anyone to know. So, of course, no one had. He was overprotective and harsh, but he allowed Arthur’s ‘passing fancy’ as long as they were being ‘discreet’. The Pendragon’s had a name and a reputation to protect after all.   
  
Gwaine hadn't cared much about it all. He wasn't looking to name anything. Putting a title on their relationship hadn't seemed important back then. It was too much of a commitment and he didn't want that. He wasn't ready for it then. He was a teenager, young and reckless and stupid. And he’d wanted to be that way. Free and unhindered to do as he pleased.  
  
He wasn't willing to admit what Arthur had meant to him or how important he had been to him. It was too much, too big for him and he couldn't handle it. Sometimes he still wondered if he could, even now when he was meant to be older, smarter, and more mature. He wasn't sure, but he sure as hell was not going to give Arthur up now, whether he’d grown up or not.

 

So he chooses to fuck with Arthur instead, so no, he probably hadn’t. “Mate, I say why choose? Let’s throw them all in a mud rink, sell tickets and call it Arthur’s Dick-for-All.”   
  
Arthur chokes a little on his beer and splutters, looking absolutely scandalized and betrayed. His only reaction to the conversation so far and Gwaine feels inordinately, childishly pleased with himself.   
  
Everyone laughs then, so Gwaine accomplishes his small task and they change the topic. It strays back to safer avenues like football and food and Doctor Who.  
  
Gwaine watches Arthur for the rest of the evening then as he relaxes and starts to enjoy the company again. He’ll ask later if Arthur really knows how much they think he’s in love with them, or if he thinks they’re in love with him and are trying to spare their feelings, if that’s why he never says anything. Arthur will just look at him and blink, perplexed and confused and adorable and say, “Oh my God, our friends our idiots.”   
  
Gwaine can’t help but agree. So he will laugh and kiss him and kiss him and kiss him some more.

 

Later that night and they’re lying in Arthur’s bed, Arthur sprawled boneless and sated on top of him. He runs his finger through Arthur’s hair and starts to think.   
  
He thinks about being eighteen and terrified of this, of saying ‘I’m sorry, I can’t’ and going off and travelling and freelance photography and articles he’d written and his guitar and performing in coffee shops across Europe.   
  
He thinks about Arthur, running off to be a soldier at fucking eighteen to piss off his father, but loving it anyway. He thinks of Arthur getting shot and being blown across a dusty battlefield last year.   
  
His hand wanders down to trace at the scars on Arthur’s left shoulder. He thinks about coming back for good then and sitting in a hospital room beside this still man praying ‘please, God, be alright’.   
  
He’s twenty-six now and he thinks of all the people he’s ever been with and realizes: ‘I’ve only ever been in love with this man for ten years now.’ He thinks about how they’ve seen each other off and on for all this time. He thinks of how whole and happy this man makes him.   
  
Arthur snuffles a little in his sleep and Gwaine smiles and lets himself drift off as well.

 

Its three weeks later and they’re in the same pub again. This time, though, Arthur sits next to him, so fucking happy he’s almost bouncing in his seat and Gwaine wants to laugh at this grown man, trained to kill, giggling like a thirteen year old school girl. He almost would too, except he’s no better off. He’s just as excited, just as fucking joyful.  
  
The rest of the group trickle in slowly, wants to know what is going on, why they’ve been summoned, but they wait until everyone is there before Arthur announces, giddily, that they’ve gotten married earlier that day, just as quietly as the rest of their relationship.  
  
It’s understandable that they’re met with such a stunned silence, hilarious too. There are also confused ‘What’s and ‘Is this some sort of joke’? Which make Arthur frown and Gwaine starts to get angry, but a waitress comes over then to bring the drinks over. She flirts with Gwaine a little and Arthur fairly growls at her, just as jealous and possessive a fucker as Gwaine pretends not to be. This seems to settle it for the group (along with the rings and wedding certificate).  
  
Though Gwaine is still forced to muddle through the whole story, He settles in for a good night though, this is his wedding reception after all. He leans into Arthur and their fingers tangle together, on top of the table.


End file.
